The Birth Of My Poetry & My Impetus to Write

Although I have written poetry all my life, I really only opened myself up to this avenue of expression following the most turbulent years of my life. It was during those years that my inner strength began to manifest, but first I had to descend into the black pit of depression.

I do not know why its so, but many poets are opened up in this way. Maybe it’s only in the depth of inner despair that we fully understand our needing to belong and search for the spiritual reality that most poets tune into in order to be able to bring their revelations and deep feelings out and onto paper.

About My Poetry Writing

So I started to express the pain and anxiety I was feeling, bring it out so that it was no longer inside me - such things held in lead to all sorts of potential problems.

Poetry comes from the heart.
I do not care for the academic assessment of poetry!
Academics can put forth their hypothesis but poetry is like dancing.
It springs from deep in the soul.
It is an uncontrolled energy which needs to be expressed.
The explosion of the inner feeling of the writer's emotions.
The lava of the soul!

© Alison Stormwolf

My attitude to poetry is very un-snobbish, I write as I feel! The words form themselves for me!

"Poetry is a flash of lightening;
It becomes mere composition
When it is an arrangement of words."
~ Kahlil Gibran ~

If I 'try' to write a poem, it does not work. Therefore, whether you like them or not, they all come from a very deep place inside me. This place was filling up The Well (my inner well) for many years but was only released after my first experience of deep depression. Maybe I needed to go deep inside myself to find the hidden key.

On Love, Loving and Heartbreak

I have suffered my fair share of heartbreak over the years which threatened to make me unwilling to trust again and which brought me to the very brink of despair. However, to love is to risk. To risk is to live! To embrace the fullness of life means becoming very vulnerable.

I took the decision that I would rather be vulnerable and true to myself and others, than to be unable to look deeply into my own eyes and not like what I saw looking back at me.

Truth, honesty, courage and kindness are what I look for in a person. The liar lies only to himself in the end and sadly often only has himself/herself in the end. Yes, we make our choices, we sometimes make mistakes. However, I have learned that in ALL things follow your heart.

True love is eternal and is known by it's deeds - Searching For The Real Thing.

The Bible tells us "Love Suffereth Long and is Kind" --1 Corinthians 13:4.

"When love beckons to you follow him
Though his ways are hard and steep
And when his wings enfold you, yield to him
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you
But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness
and pass out of love's threshing floor,
Into the season-less world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter,
and weep, but not all of your tears."
~ from 'The Prophet' by Kahlil Gibran ~

It really is a 'season-less world' if we shut ourselves off from experience because we are fearful of being hurt - like a garden covered with concrete to save weeds growing, but also then never allowing flowers either. We need to open ourselves up to the whole gamut of potential experiences in order to be "fully alive" in the "Moment".

"The heart has its reasons
which reason knows nothing of."
~ Blaise Pascal - French mathematician, physicist
(1623 - 1662) ~

Against Advice

Come to me in the deep reaches of the night,
When day has laid aside her judgement
Of what is wrong and what is right
And everything simply is
For love is love, no matter what
And as such must always be pure
Then I must be content with that,
And ask or expect no more
For no matter how I try to reason,
Argue the case with myself or others
Pure love will interject and bring down
The missiles of hate and blame,
If I am a fool, then fool I am;
But if I am a fool for love
Then I will willingly surrender to that label
I have no say anyway;
My heart has shouted me down
From my lofty pillar of 'how things should be'
Take it from me; Follow your heart!
At least then, in the final reckoning
You shall be weighed in the balance;
And not found wanting
For no matter how unworthy a cause;
How little the reward
Your intention was pure.

© Alison Storm Wolf

May you find inspiration, healing, laughter and understanding through the reading of my poems. In doing so, you will realise we are all the same. We all suffer in our insecurities, doubts and fears. However, those who will win through are the courageous ones who follow their hearts in spite of what anything or anyone tells us is 'right.'

"It is wrong to think that love comes from long companionship
and persevering courtship.
Love is the offspring of spiritual affinity
and unless that affinity is created in a moment,
it will not be created for years or even generations."
~ Khalil Gibran ~

I have battled the dark dog of depression which effectively broke me down - making me an empty vessel so that I could become built up again in a new way with new perspectives and new aims in life. During that terrible time I wrote many poems expressing my feelings. It was a very valuable outlet to me.

I often wonder how I kept going but my belief that everything happens for a purpose helped me keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Broken

I am broken and can’t be fixed
Like some discarded toy
Relegated to the back of the cupboard,
A bear with no growl
A doll with eyes stuck open… or closed
Blindly unable to accept
The eroding of my life.
Shutting off the pain
Of too many losses
Fatal flaws incompatible with happiness
An embarrassment to myself
And those I love
Anger, hurt and humiliation
Devouring my tender heart.
Where is the physician of the soul?
Can he work a wonder here?

© Alison Storm Wolf

I now believe people come into our lives for a very special reason. The teaching they bring us may not be to our liking but it is always to our higher good. I now know that even in the darkest times in our lives there is an undercurrent of potential good going on that we are often not aware of.

I have many wonderful memories stored in my memory bank which I treasure. Even in the darkest times there were incidents and acts of random kindness which reminded me that there is a lot of good in the world.

"Ah, love! could thou and I with Fate conspire
To grasp this sorry Scheme of Things entire,
Would we not shatter it to bits - and then
Re-mould it nearer to the Heart's Desire!"
~ The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam ~

Inspirational Poems

The poems below encompass my beliefs in the invisible realm, creating our own reality, and the knowledge that we are eternal beings. We share our universe with many other beings. We talk of conquering space and putting men on the moon. What about exploring the wonderful, unlimited and truly magical realms of our own inner beings? That is where we will find the answers to everything.

  Night Summons
  Company
  Magic Intentions
  Invisible Threads
  New Beginnings
  Birth Of The Light

Poems now come at times complete, and sometimes I have to scribble them down on odd bits of paper. Sometimes I have had to get up in the middle of the night and write out what is taking place in my head.

It has been a major blessing in my life.

I was always scared I would leave this world not having left my mark on the ether. Now I have my poetry (about 900 to date). Through that my children (and grandchildren when they arrive) will be able to really see 'me.'

Mellow Musings

How much kinder is the mellow mind
When hate or spite have packed their bags
And left for pastures new.

How much wisdom gained from life
When time has danced across the clock
Of your individual unfolding.

So much deep and lasting joy
In a heart well used and battered into shape
Like some treasured old shoes

I have fought my battles well
Always the warrior, never defeated
Ready for life's next onslaught.

But somewhere deep inside
These fearless birds of prey
Fly homeward seeking refuge,

The night is drawing in
The horizon has lost its appeal
The sheltered roost beckons.

I fly over my hometown
And my heart is strangely sad
And suffused with love at once

Fleeting moments on this earth
Passing SO soon into obscurity,
Do you see MY footprints
On the wet sand?

© Alison Storm Wolf

God's greatest gifts often come in the heaviest disguise...
Alison Stormwolf